3.30.2010

Easier, but still hard

As a new mom, you often hear the phrase "it gets easier."  Don't worry, it gets easier.  I've said this myself, many times, to new mom friends and to lots of parents to multiples in particular.  Just hang in there, it gets much easier.  And it really does, in so many ways. 

I don't really want to have to say this, it sounds like I'm complaining and I'm really not, BUT... it gets harder in some ways too.  I know, that's something no new mom wants to hear, multiples or not.  (Keep in mind that I speak only from the perspective of a mother to multiples.)  And really, while some things are harder at times, I don't think anything will be as hard as those first few weeks were.  NOTHING.  So there's that to be happy about, right?!

my 2 girls
Trying cereal bars for the first time.

What makes this stage harder?  The increased mobility is definitely a challenge.  Addison and Mackenzie are not walking yet (um, thank goodness?), but they are already into everything.  Got a cabinet or a drawer within reach?  They are opening it and pulling out everything inside.  Crumbs on the floor?  They're eating them.  Electrical cords in sight?  My girls are chewing on them.  Not that any of those things are out of the ordinary for babies their age, it's just exhausting trying to keep two sets of hands off of things they shouldn't have.

Bathtime is one of my favorite parts of the day.  I only get to spend a couple of hours with the girls in the evenings since they go to bed so early, so watching them play in the bathtub is quality time.  There was a time when they just sat there, contentedly playing with their toys and chewing on their washcloths.  Now?  They are fighting over who gets to stick a hand under the running water, crawling over one another in the tub, pulling up to stand, laying down in the tub, splashing, kicking, and generally trying to give me a heart attack.  I break a sweat just trying to get them in the bath, not to mention actually getting them clean! 

Mobility has made getting them dressed/undressed challenging enough that I actually consider it my workout for the day.  While I'm holding one baby down to get socks on her squirmy little feet, the other baby is heading out the door and down the hall.  I run to grab her, and find that the first baby has efficiently discarded both socks and is working on removing her diaper.  It's a vicious cycle.

Addison likes it...
It took Addison a little while to decide she liked it.

I thought life would get a lot easier when the girls could hold their own bottles and wouldn't be completely dependent on me to feed them numerous times a day.  While it definitely did, I neglected to think about what would happen when the girls stopped taking formula.  For this first year of life, they have gotten all their essential nutrition from formula, with solids just being a fun "extra."  As they move toward a full table-food diet, I get more nervous about meeting their nutritional needs.  They are now refusing baby food and relying completely on table food.  The issue?  They are getting pickier about the table foods they want to eat.  Right now, the majority of their meals consist of peas, carrots, lima beans, cinnamon-raisin bagels, cheese toast, yogurt, crackers, and occasionally oatmeal.  There is no meat that they will consistently eat, and I can't think of how to get a meat in their diet.  (I know meat is not a necessity at this age, or any age for that matter, but I stress about the protein they need.)  I'm just stressing a little about being responsible for making sure they get the foods they need, and trying to stay focused on "good" foods rather than processed convenience items.

All in all, the fun outweighs the challenges of this stage, but good Lord, I'm exhausted.  Sometimes it's hard to enjoy the fun things they are doing for worrying about what needs to be done or what I should be teaching them. 

i like it, mom!
Mackenzie LOVED hers, evidenced by the mess on her tray.

I'm just feeling a little burnt out this week, in case you can't tell.  It didn't help matters that Addison was sick this weekend.  She ran a fever from Friday evening until last night and just generally felt like crap, bless her heart.  She has all kinds of teeth coming in (FIVE, at last count), and the doctor said it looked like the beginning of an ear infection when I took her in yesterday.  She's got some medicine and is doing much better tonight, but whew...it was an exhausting weekend.  It breaks my heart when one of my babies is sick and just wants to be held and rocked and cuddled, but when you've got another baby who feels great and wants Mama to play, it just makes it even harder.  Mackenzie was really great this weekend, though, she played by herself a lot and was just generally a happy baby (as she usually is, we just appreciated it even more this weekend!). 

We had planned to skip church on Sunday and Jeremy was going to let me sleep in--something I have only gotten to do a couple of times since this time last year.  With Addison being sick, it wasn't quite as relaxing as I'd hoped, but I did get an extra three hours in.  I hope I will get to try again in another month or two.

Of course, even though I'm feeling out of sorts this week, I will be getting my act together to enjoy some birthday festivities this weekend!  The big party is next Saturday, but Jeremy and I are both off work on Friday to spend the day with our ONE-year-olds.  I am counting on some time at the playground and lots of much-needed family time as we celebrate one year with our sweet girls (as exhausting as they may be!).

9 comments:

  1. Well I'm only a couple of months ahead of you, but in my opinion, things get much easier when they start walking! I love that I can call them into a room and that they're able to follow me and actually keep up! They're much more content!

    I'm a little overwhelmed at times with their nutrition also. It's a big responsibility! Luckily, my girls will eat anything I put in front of them, but I'm sure that won't always be the case.

    Can't wait to see party pics! Glad Addison is feeling better for the big day! Have FUN!

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  2. It doesn't get any easier- it just gets different. The struggles and challenges you face will just be something new and un-mapped. Perhaps I'm just all doom and gloom because I'm potty training. But I can at least say with assurity that after the first year it seems easier because at least you will have slept through the night and can come at these new challenges without your eyes going crossed from sheer exhaustion. :)

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  3. I agree with the person who commented above me. It doesn't get easier, it gets different and you change your normal routines to make it work. Your girls are beautiful and healthy and everything will work itself out, it always does. My girls are about 4 months older than your girls and I can tell you that the feeding thing has only gotten harder. Foods they once LOVED get thrown on the floor now. Sigh.

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  4. I agree....things are different with different stages. I only have one so I am not sure how you do it :) Ava is so picky. She only likes junk food and refuses any healthy table food. Its overwhelming.

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  5. I've said this very thing before. I think we're often afraid to say, "It doesn't get easier, exactly" to parents with children younger than ours because they look to us for hope on the dark, exhausting days. I love having a community of mothers to turn to who are willing to admit to the imperfections and difficulties of raising twins. I love that my mother-in-law admits her own parenting mistakes. If I had only my mum's self-described perfection to look to, I'd feel like such a failure.

    One of the most amazing things about having nearly 4-year-olds is how often they tell me I've done a good job. Praise from other parents helps, but praise from your own kids? THAT is what it's all about, and THAT does make it easier, in the moment.

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  6. Isn't Sadia a rock star???

    But Deanna, I'm getting very scared. First the food strike, then K starts crawling, Mommy Esq's post the other day and now your post.

    Next thing you know I won't be able to control them at all!!!

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  7. I am so glad I found your blog (although I cannot recall where I found it). You make me remember when mine were that little...it DOES get easier (then it gets harder again)! First, your kids are adorable! Second, I HATED the first few weeks...with a passion. Third, sick kids are so hard...hang in there...it's no wonder you're burnt!

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  8. Thanks for all the support, you guys! It helps to remember that we're all dealing with similar issues...and you all that have been there can remind us that we will survive. : )

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  9. I laughed when I read this, as we're at the same point too. Our boys are a little over 10 months right now and they are more mobile, very difficult to dress and hate any thought of baby food. Having a 9 year old daughter I know it's not easier, just different, but I'll agree with you that the newborn phase with multiples is really really rough. It could never get worse than that. The lack of sleep was really torture.

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