The Panopticon, by Jenni Fagan

I must admit, it took me forever to get around to starting this book.  I am not sure why I kept putting it off, either.  I have been in a general reading slump for the last few weeks, which is particularly distressing because I've read some great things this summer.  Lately, when everything is finally done for the evening and I can sit down to read for awhile, I just feel so completely wiped out that I can't even face concentrating on any book, no matter how good it might be.  Thankfully, I feel like the slump is lifting and I have a few things I'm excited to get started on.  Plus, we have a week at the beach quickly approaching, where I am hoping for plenty of quality reading time in the sun!

When I did finally get started on The Panopticon, I was surprised at how quickly I became interested in the story.  I had heard it was dark and gritty, and somewhat violent, and I think I was sort of prepared to not like it so much. It didn't take long to become invested in the story, however, and I found myself quite attached to Anais by the end of the second chapter.  I was so consumed by the story that I even quickly began to read over the Scottish dialect without having to think about it for too long.  (Unfamiliar dialect can really detract from a story sometimes, when I am constantly having to stop and figure out what's really being said.  That was not so much the case here, after a few pages.)

Anais Hendricks, nearly sixteen, has been in the foster care system for her entire life.  When we meet her in this story, she is on her way to the Panopticon, a home for chronic young offenders, after being accused of assaulting a policewoman.  We are quickly given a brief insight into the difficult life Anais has lived, being shuffled around in the system, with very few people who ever looked out for her best interests.

Anais is as tough as she is pitiable, and she quickly forms a bond with some of the other kids at her latest "home".  The other kids come from a variety of backgrounds, many as harsh and depressing as Anais's.  They all have their own stories, each as compelling as the next.  (Okay, I'll admit it, Isla's was the one that got to me the most; oh, how I just want to love that girl!)  At its heart, The Panopticon is the story of these children of the system, most particularly Anais, but the others as well, and how they keep fighting in a world that just wants to discard them. 

There was a surprisingly happy twist at the end of this book, one I'm not sure I can completely trust.  (After all, much of the story is told from Anais's drug-addled point of view and we know she makes up elaborate stories about her past.)  But you know what?  I'm going with it--I am choosing to believe she got that happy ending and that Anais is living just as simply and happily as she always dreamed she might. (I loved the ending, honestly.)

I should note, as have many others, that this book is not for the faint of heart.  There is no shortage of violence, terrible language, drug use, and sex...but it's all part of the institutional setting of the story.  Even though it was distressing and a bit hard to read at times, I am grateful to this book for putting me back in the mood to curl up and read at the end of the day!

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I received a copy of this book for review via TLC Book Tours and the publisher.  All opinions expressed are entirely my own.  For more reviews, check out the full tour post.

Lucky Seven

Last week, Jeremy and I celebrated seven years of marriage.  I can't help but think how very young we were seven years ago, and even more so eleven years ago when we started dating.  We have been through so much together--though, thankfully not nearly as much as some people we know--and we have done a lot of growing up together.

Just look at us!  We were babies.  This picture was taken on our first Christmas together, in 2002.

When we married, neither of us knew much about keeping a house, beyond the very basics, and the meals cooked in our kitchen were few and far between.  We managed to keep ourselves clothed, clean, and fed, but it felt like a struggle at times.  I contrast that to now, when we work as a decent team to keep our household going.  We manage to get dinner on the table every night, and not only take care of ourselves, but of two little people as well.  (We still have some things to work on in the housekeeping department...it seems this may very well be a lifelong struggle of ours!)  When I have to be away from home, I have absolutely no doubt that Jeremy will keep things running and take excellent care of the girls without batting an eye (and vice versa, of course).  That fact alone tells me how far we have come. 

And one from this year, for comparison.

Seven years feels like a long time...you know, "seven-year itch" and all that jazz.  But really, I feel more settled, more complete, more satisfied than ever.  I think J and I consistently act more and more like a team, a united front, and I love that I have such a fantastic partner to experience this life with me.

I love that instead of a fancy vacation and expensive gifts, we took a short anniversary trip to Atlanta and took in two Braves games.  We keep it simple around here, and that's the way we are both happiest.  I love the life, the family, and the home that we have built, that we continue to build, and I look forward to so many more good things to come in our future.

Happy anniversary, my love!  You're my best good buddy, and I'm still thankful you're mine. 

Hungry, by Darlene Barnes

I don't read a lot of memoirs, but if more were written like this book, I would gladly become a devoted fan of the genre.  I loved Hungry because I loved Darlene Barnes's writing.  Her voice made the book for me.  She is funny, straightforward, and very relatable.  She's someone I would totally want for a friend, but I'd be careful to stay on her good side!

Hungry: What Eighty Ravenous Guys Taught Me About Life, Love and the Power of Good Food is the story of the author's experiences as a cook for the Alpha Sigma Phi fraternity at the University of Washington in Seattle.  After relocating to Seattle with her husband, Barnes is eager for a career of her own in the food industry, and she takes on a job that most "serious food professionals" would never consider.  The job with Alpha Sigma Phi brings unexpected challenges, as well as unexpected rewards.

Having been in a sorority in college, and having married a fraternity boy, I could relate to many of Darlene's struggles, as well as her stories.  One of the things I appreciated most about this book is that she presented a fair picture of Greek life as I experienced it.  Yes, there are parties and pranks, and there is privilege and competition, both in and among organizations.  But there are also real, true relationships being forged, friendships and connections that can last a lifetime.  Darlene did a great job of portraying all that here, even if it wasn't the focus of the book.  Her "guys" were familiar to me--they were just like many of my own college friends--and Alpha Sig reminded me a lot of my husband's fraternity. 

As for the food part of the book, I found it fascinating as well.  Barnes was a believer in "real food" from local sources, long before such things were trendy.  Naturally, she faced an uphill battle, both from fraternity boys happy to live on Easy Mac and from her traditional food distributors who couldn't seem to understand why she cared so much about where the chicken originated.  I loved Darlene's no-bull attitude and admired the way she took charge of the fraternity kitchen as well as the boys who sought her out for guidance.  The humorous and poignant stories are the heart of Hungry, but the discussion of food is woven seamlessly throughout the narrative, along with recipes at the end of each chapter.

I enjoyed every bit of this book, from cover to cover.  Whether you're interested in the foodie aspect or the behind-the-scenes look at life in a fraternity (from a female point of view, nonetheless!), there's a lot to love about Hungry. 

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Want to read Hungry: What Eighty Ravenous Guys Taught Me About Life, Love, and the Power of Good Food?  

Leave a comment on this post to be entered to win a copy for yourself!  If you want, tell me if you were a part of the Greek system in college.

(Giveaway is open to U.S./Canada residents only.  The giveaway will close on Monday, August 12, at 10:00 p.m.  Please leave a contact email if I don't already have yours.)

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I received a copy of this book for review via TLC Book Tours and the publisher.  All opinions expressed are entirely my own.  For more reviews, check out the full tour post.

The State of Affairs: June & July 2013

A double recap, thanks to my blogging slump...let's see if I can remember what happened all the way back in June.

---I had a birthday; I'm not too old to have forgotten that!  I turned 31 and celebrated with a dinner at one of my favorite restaurants (Bonefish Grill) with family and friends.  As an added bonus, my actual birthday fell on a state holiday, so I got the day off.  The girls spent the night with our cousin Lindsey again (and stayed up waaaayyyy past their bedtime!) so that I could have a day to sleep in.  Addison helped Jeremy pick out my present, including a coffee mug that says "My Mom is My BFF".  It's pretty much my new favorite thing.  (On second thought, I think the mug was from Mother's Day, but I'm leaving it in here because it really is one of my favorite things.  I don't want to forget that she picked it out for me.)

---Jeremy officially moved to a new division in June, meaning he works normal daytime hours (for the most part)!  This is literally the first time in more than six years that we have been on the same schedule.  It is SO nice having him home in the evenings, to play with the girls while I cook supper, to trade off baths, etc., and just to be here and be able to enjoy the evening with us.  I hope I don't ever take it for granted.  Yes, we both mourn the loss of our 'alone time' occasionally, but we are adjusting well, I think. 

---J had a class in Nashville in late June.  It's rare that he gets to attend one by himself (i.e. without sharing a hotel room with a coworker), so I tagged along and we made a trip of it.  We shopped and ate and binge-watched episodes of Revenge in the hotel room.  While J was in class, I ran on the hotel's treadmill (I RAN ON VACATION!  That should equal an extra five lbs. lost right there.) and lounged by the pool with a book.  On Wednesday, my mom and aunt brought A & M up to stay the rest of the week with us.  The girls were pumped about staying in a hotel, which they have only done a few times.  We swam, ate, walked around, and visited the Frist Center for Visual Arts.  (I highly recommend that place if you find yourself in downtown Nashville--it's free for kids and has a great hands-on art section on the top floor.)  It was a fun, fun week, and a nice getaway in the middle of summer.

---We had a very low-key 4th of July.  It rained steadily for most of that long weekend, but we made the most of it.  The girls spent two nights with Jeremy's parents, so he and I enjoyed a couple of date nights.  (It seems like A & M spent a lot of nights away from us, but it wasn't all that much.  It does tend to happen a little more often when they aren't in school!)

---A & M attended Vacation Bible School at our church, and loved it, of course.  

---We went to a wedding, and everyone bragged on how well-behaved the girls were (I will never get tired of hearing that!).  They were so interested in every detail of the ceremony.  

---J and I went whitewater rafting with a group of friends from church.  I'll admit, I was not too excited during the week leading up to the trip, but I ended up having a blast.  I haven't been rafting in about 15 years, but I might be willing to repeat it again next year.  

---J and I rounded out July with a Braves game with two of our good friends.  They are Cardinals fans, but the Braves pulled it out to win the series, so Jeremy and I were the happy fans on the drive home!  : )

Books Read in June:  4
The Perks of Being a Wallflower--I have heard so much about this book over the years, and then....it sucked.  Maybe I missed something; maybe it was just me, but I really did not like it at all.  (Am I alone?)

Will Grayson, Will Grayson--This was the perfect book to read after Perks.  It restored my faith in smart, unpretentious YA.

The Disreputable History of Frankie Landau-Banks--More smart YA.  I have heard a lot about this one, too, and I was a little afraid I wouldn't like it (there is a lot about prank wars, etc. that are not always my cup of tea).  I was greatly relieved to find that I liked it a lot, actually.   

The Exiles--Not a bad book; especially since I read most of it by the pool in Nashville.  Reviewed here.  

Books Read in July:  5
A Little Salty to Cut the Sweet--This is Sophie Hudson's debut book, full of stories about faith, family, and life in the South.  Sophie writes her book like she writes her blog, with much humor and heart, and I enjoyed her book quite a bit.

The Last Winter of Dani Lancing--Well, there had to be a dud in here somewhere, and this one was it.  Intriguing premise, but the author just didn't quite pull it off.  I kept reading to find out the solution to the mystery, which was rather disappointing as well.

Looking for Me--A little slow, but a nice, enjoyable story.  I'm a sucker for a Charleston setting.  I was afraid the ending was going to be unresolved (which I HATE), but it was done in a way that I thought worked out nicely.

Hungry--I have a review of this one coming early next week, but this was by far my favorite nonfiction read of the year (admittedly, I haven't read many, but still....).  Very good!

Me Before You--It seems like everyone is reading this lately, and for good reason.  I stayed up until 4 a.m. to finish it, then went to bed with swollen eyes and a stuffy nose from all the tears.  (Despite the tears, I do recommend it!)

Etc...
I'm down about 9 lbs. since beginning Weight Watchers in early June.  I am exercising regularly, thanks in large part to J being home at night.  I try to run at least three times a week and do yoga or some other type of light workout at least twice a week.  I need to get another link removed from my watch because it's now big enough to twist around my wrist...so things are going pretty well!

J and I saw The Heat on one of our date nights, and oh my goodness, I have not laughed that hard in a long time.  Lots of language, but so hilarious.

I have been painting a dresser for the girls' room for about three weeks now.  It is the largest piece of furniture I've painted so far, and I'm rather pleased at how it has turned out. I still have to put a clear coat on top and get some new knobs, but the end is near.  I'll share a picture when I'm finished. 

Oh, look! An actual post!

Hello, long-lost blog friends!  In an effort to get myself somewhat back in the blogging habit, how about some quick takes for an update on our lives?

• I have spent a lot of time lately thinking about this blog and what I want it to be.  I have debated whether or not I really want to continue writing.  I decided that I do want to keep it up, but I'm not sure in what capacity.  There are only so many "we're great; the girls are happy; life is good" posts I can write before I bore even myself.  I definitely want to continue writing about and reviewing books, but beyond that, I'm just not sure.  Still some thinking to do, obviously.

• On that note, yes, we are all doing just fine these days.  We have mostly adjusted to J being home in the evenings.  The novelty has not worn off yet.  (I get to cook real, full meals to share with another adult, a fact that really does thrill me!)  We have been busy with summertime adventures, activities with church and friends, and just life in general.  

• Since I wrote about starting Weight Watchers, I have lost almost 10 lbs.  Even more than that, I have managed to figure out and stick to an actual exercise plan, and I am truly enjoying it.  A couple of pairs of pants already don't fit, and a couple more are getting loose...good thing I wear mostly dresses in the summer.  I want to wait another month or two (and hopefully be closer to my goal weight) before splurging on new clothes.

• As I said, we have been pretty busy with general summer fun, including a few short trips here and there, but we are all beginning to count the days until our beach vacation in early September.  (Less than six weeks away!)  We are staying a full week this time, and Addison is thrilled about that fact.  She keeps holding up seven fingers, telling anyone who will listen that we are staying at the beach "a whole seven days!"  Her enthusiasm is definitely contagious.  

• We are considering adding a new member to our family (NOT A BABY!!)--a dog.  Our local animal shelter is being fantastic enough to let us bring a little guy home for a trial run of sorts this weekend.  We'll see if we are ready to handle this new addition...it should be an interesting weekend!  I will certainly report back on that matter.  : )

• I have been reading SO many good things lately; I can't wait to share some of my favorites.  Inspiration to blog again soon, right? 

How are things with y'all?  I miss my blog friends!!

The Exiles, by Allison Lynn {Review & Giveaway}

Well, hello there!  I didn't intend to disappear from the old blog like I did, but I've been enjoying a pretty busy summer and writing moved to the backburner for awhile. 

One thing I haven't been skimping on lately?  Reading.  I have read lots of good books this summer (and at least one terrible one, but that's not what you want to hear about, right?).

While on vacation/Jeremy's work trip in Nashville a couple of weeks ago, I read Allison Lynn's new book The Exiles.  It was a great vacation read, weighty enough but not overly depressing. 

Set in the early- to mid-2000s, The Exiles is the story of a couple struggling to have it all.  Nate and Emily have come to terms with the fact that they can no longer keep up with the demands of their extravagant New York City lifestyle.  Nate is offered a respectable job in Rhode Island, and the couple, along with their ten-month-old son make the decision to relocate.  The book details their move-in weekend, which turns somewhat disastrous when the Jeep containing many of their belongings is stolen.  As Nate and Emily tough it out in their new situation, they face some hard truths about their lives and the secrets they've kept from one another.

While I basically did not like Nate or Emily very much, I did feel a bit of pity for them at times.  Yes, they are in desperate need of a kick in the pants, and someone should tell them to grow up and take responsibility for their lives and the family they created.  No, I cannot imagine the pressure to "keep up with the Joneses" they felt among their NYC social group.  I guess I felt sorry for them because they don't seem know how very good the world can be beyond that group they struggle to fit into (and then feel a bit of shame over leaving).

Most of all, though?  While reading The Exiles, I felt really, really grateful that Jeremy and I have never really felt that we had anything to prove.  We don't feel pressure to have prestigious careers or to have the best of everything.  We are happy with our simple, comfortable lifestyle and we are content with what we have (for the most part--I'm not saying I wouldn't like to have a slightly bigger house or a pool in the backyard...but we all have a wishlist of some sort, right?).  Nate and Emily managed to redeem themselves a little by the end of the book, but their story really did make me appreciate my life, and the family I have, more than ever.

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~GIVEAWAY~

Thanks to the publisher, I am able to offer a copy of The Exiles to one reader!  To enter, just leave a comment on this post.  The giveaway will end at 10:00 p.m. on Sunday, July 21, and is open to U.S./Canada residents only.

I received a copy of this book for review via TLC Book Tours and the publisher.  All opinions expressed are entirely my own.  For more reviews, check out the full tour post.

Seriously, this time

Growing up, I was one of those skinny kids that never gave a second thought to what I was eating.  I loved my vegetables, but from a young age I learned to like them best the southern way--fried okra, fried squash, and mashed potatoes being at the top of the list.  For most of my life, right up until the last six or seven years, it was no big deal.  I could eat all my favorite things without worry.  Even more than that, I could take exercise (in the form of sports or walking, usually...nothing too strenuous!) or leave it, without a difference in my body or weight.

When Jeremy and I met in 2002, I was at one of the lower points of my college weight, just under 100 lbs.  (Yes, I spent most of high school and some of my college years being just plain skinny.)  While that weight is under where I need, or want, to be, it is far past time for the pounds that have crept on over the years to GO.

As I have aged and my metabolism has slowed, my habits--or lack thereof--have caught up with me.  My weight has settled between 140-145 lbs (yep, just putting it out there!)...which seems to be where I stay without working to do anything about it.  I was at this point when I got pregnant with the girls, then dropped down to about 128 after they were born.  Obviously, over the last four years I didn't change much and it added up again.

So what to do about it?  I am finally at the point where I am really, really ready to change my habits and take control of my weight and my health.

My eating habits are already so much better than they used to be, and they continue to improve.  I am still running on a fairly regular basis, with plans to continue that and finally get to a regular three times a week schedule.  Now it's time to put the two together...and I have a plan.

Some friends at work and I started the Weight Watchers plan in the last week.  (I confess:  we are cheating and not signing up for the actual program.  All of them except me have done it before, so we have the guidelines and food values we need, just not the monthly fee.)  I have also joined an online group, the Biggest Blogging Loser, coordinated by the fabulous Jennie.  It's just an encouragement/competition sort of thing, with each of us doing our own method.

Having never tried the Weight Watchers program, I was pretty excited to start.  It has gone well so far (admittedly, it's only been a few days...but I'm on track to lose at least four pounds this week!), and it feels very manageable.  I make my choices and technically eat whatever I want, as long as I fit the points in to my daily allowance.  I realize just how much mindless snacking I was doing, and I'm learning to let myself be hungry for mealtime, instead of shoving tortilla chips in my face while I'm cooking because I feel like I'm starving.  I managed to eat out over the weekend and enjoyed my meals, while still making pretty good choices overall.

The key to my progress so far seems to be the combination of the diet changes with my running.  Instead of the 170 calories I burn on my evening run cancelling out the brownie I ate in the afternoon, it's coming off my much more reasonable daily intake.  And it's actually making a difference!  Who would have thought?  Seeing progress is a huge motivator for me, so I hope I can keep up the enthusiasm.  Then, by the time I meet my goal weight (around 125, I think), the idea is that my habits will have changed enough that I no longer feel like I'm "dieting".  This will just be how I eat and how I exercise, forever and ever, amen.  (We've all heard the "it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle" spill, which I know is true.)

One more thing that's making all this feel much more manageable...  As of this week, Jeremy is home in the evenings!!  Yes, for the first time in our nearly seven-year marriage, he is now working normal daytime hours, at least most of the time.  It couldn't have happened at a better time, as it's just been in the last few weeks that it has gotten absolutely too hot to run after work.  And the idea of me getting up before work to exercise is just laughable.  Give me 9:00 at night over 6:00 in the morning anytime.  Not only can I make the workout happen, I can actually cook a meal for someone besides myself.  The girls are good to eat most of the things we do, but sometimes it's just so much easier to throw down a bowl of cereal and call it dinner.  I am just thrilled in general to have him home at night, in case you can't tell.  (We'll see if that holds true after a few weeks of losing my evening alone time and having to share the remote....)

So there's what's going on around here.  Lots of salads, skinny ranch, and grilled chicken, basically!  But it will all be worth it, I am confident.

What's going on with you this week??